What is a platform?
Day after day, week after week, I manage to e
scape the noose that EB has prepared especially for my neck. She has the platform built and the knot tied. So when people ask her if she’s going to tie the knot, she tells them she already has. She ties a good noose, no doubt about that. The problem is, I’m not too happy about for whom the noose tolls, or looking out the window and seeing platform she has built to hasten my demise. I’m not a young man, folks, but I’d like to live out my years, not have the cut short by an angry EB wielding a noose!
Anyway, all this, I’m sure, is quite educational for you, but it has nothing to do with computers, and many of you are thinking this newsletter doesn’t either. But I beg your collective pardon!
A platform is more than a gallows — a place where EB tries to lure me. A platform, in computer terms means Operating System. Why don’t they just call it operating system? I don’t know, but I’ll ask EB after she’s taken her tranquilizer. We don’t the just call it The Internet or The Web? Why do they call it “The Cloud”. It’s for the same reason we call round York peppermint patties “candy bars”, when they’re not bars at all.
So when geeks and yuppies ask you what platform your running, tell them Windows 8 point one — or whatever. Of course, they’ll scoff at you because you’re supposed to say “EYE OH ES SEVEN”, or “LINUX WATERMELON” or Aunt Droid or one of those non-Windows platforms, er I mean operating systems.
But fear not, folks, Bill Gates is returning to Microsoft and he’s a visionary — he’ll make Windows cool again so that yuppies and geek types don’t scowl at you when they ask you what platform you’re using and you say Windows 7 or Windows 8. I would say Windows 10 — that would confuse them and have them running back to peruse the blogs thinking they missed something.
A platform, in computerese simply means the operating system. A platform in EB-ese, means a gallows. Take your pick! I’m sure by now you wouldn’t mind if EB strung me up for grammatical crimes and misdemeanors.
I’m sitting here at 4am giggling at your hilarious sense of humor informing us about platforms! You do get on a roll don’t you? LOL!
One of these days EB will getcha back too!! I used to tell my sons I’d get them back as they had to sleep sometime when they said or did something to tease/pick on me.:))
TC, I agree wholeheartedly. The “Cloud” is just another spiffy (read dumb) term for a file server somewhere. It’s never been anything else but that and never will be. This server could literally be located anywhere in the world but it’s still a server, nothing more. If it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, and looks like a duck then guess what? Yep, you got it. As for Darcy’s noose, come on now. Have a bit of mercy on “seasoned citizens” such as TC and myself. After all, who knows, you might decide to come after me next! Please, no, anything but that, anything? (Grin)
TC you’re sooo funny. It’s a good thing you two still have your sense of humor.
I don’t think you would lasted so long without it…..especially with “fruit cakes” like me “rattling your cages” all the time. Sometimes we need a good chuckle no matter what time of day/night we happen to be reading your creative ramblings.
I’ve always wondered about the term “cloud”. Since there are “clouds” over the heads of all of us no matter what part of the world we live in, do you think the term was selected to appeal to the world? The term “cloud” I think brings on a comfortable and relaxing image to most people’s minds….like a safe, clear and sunny day. It’s a mindgame. Most wouldn’t think about a “storm” cloud.
I know it’s really a server or a bunch of servers. I also know that servers “talk” to each other. When, a US company, say Microsoft for instance (which is really an international company), offers “cloud” storage, do you think we should have the right to know which country the server holding MY stuff is located? I ask this because the laws that protect us here in the US don’t apply when the server is located in a different country. It is governed by THAT country’s laws. I could be wrong, but that’s my understanding. Bottom line….I will NEVER trust the “cloud” for storing anything important to me…except maybe on a very short-term basis, because I don’t trust that the “owner” of the cloud/server gives even a little hoot about protecting ME or MY stuff…not really.
Please could you tell me how to make a star?
I use the ♫ you taught me all the time for birthdays.
Once in a while the ♥
but I would really like to know how to make the star.
Thank you.