The King of Cheap Computers

The King of Cheap Computers

The Computer Buying Guide for Poor Folk

I was reading an article about beer, which has nothing to do with computers, you might think. But it does. I always wanted to be a sommelier and say things like, “Oh, this wine has a nice nose,” or “it has hints of blackberry and oak.” But you know what, they make that stuff up, I swear. I’ve never tasted a wine with a nose or that reeked of blackberry and oak. And worse yet, I just read an article from a guy who claims to be a beer-tasting expert, warning people about the consequences of buying cheap beer. There’s no such thing as a bad beer; some are just better than others. Which brings me to today’s subject: Cheap Computers.

Not many days go by that we don’t get a question from someone shopping for a new Windows computer asking: “What should I look for in a new computer?” And we always give the same answer – RAM RAM RAM, the size of screen you like, and unless you’re going to be doing wild 3D graphics, or heavy-duty databases, or you’re an AI nut, then just about any processor that supports Windows 11 will support you fairly well.

Which brings me to my point: I’m the king of cheap computers. Darcy barely pays me, so I have little money to squander. I’m sure you’ve all heard about trying to squeeze blood from a turnip. I’ve had Dell, Acer, HP, and ASUS computers – never had a Lenovo though. And perhaps Dell and the other big boys provide some after-sales service, I’ve never had to take advantage of it, though I can’t see where spending $1000 + on a laptop makes much sense. If you think the thing is going to go belly up, whether it be Dell, HP, ASUS, Lenovo, or some other “brand” name, then you probably shouldn’t buy it in the first place. Yeah, I hear ya, but it makes no sense to me – because you see, I’m the kind of cheap computers.

You might think I’m just a-rambling on here, making stuff up as I go, but unlike the aforementioned sommelier with his blackberry notes and heady nose, I do know what I’m talking about. I  currently have three computers, all laptops, and altogether I spent less than $800 total. Yes, I  have no money. My pay is embarrassing. You can contact Darcy for particulars.

Let’s go through my menagerie of cheap computers, shall we?

The first foray into cheap computers came when I purchased my first ALLDOCUBE.

ALLDOCUBE Laptop Computer 14-inch PC, Intel JasperLake N5100, Quad Core, 12GB RAM, 256GB SSD, FHD IPS Display, 10000mah, WiFi 6, Bluetooth 5.1, Type C, Backlit Keyboard, Windows 11 Home, Silver

It’s no longer available. But when I got mine, it had Windows 10 on it and cost me $199. It was the pinnacle of cheap. The plastic case warped from the heat. It lasted me only about 18 months. I moved on to my AceMagic.

ACEMAGIC Laptop 16-inch FHD Display, 16GB RAM 512GB ROM with Intel 12th Gen Alder Lake N95(4C/4T, Up to 3.4GHz) Laptop Computer Support WiFi, BT5.0, Webcam, 3*USB3.2, Type-C.

I paid $269 for my AceMagic, and it’s now 2 years old. Other than replacing the keyboard for $14, I’ve had no problems with it.  It’s still working fine. It’s one of my two work computers.

Are you paying attention? I still have not spent more than $289 on a laptop since I entered my “cheap mode” in 2022 – that’s when Darcy cut my pay and put me on bread and water for sustenance, which is an excellent way to lose weight.

My third computer, which I purchased late last year, is another off-the-wall brand. Well, let me tell you about it.

NIAKUN 16 Inch Laptop Computer, Gaming Laptop, 16GB RAM 512GB SSD, N95 Processor, FHD 1920 * 1200, 180 Angle Open, Backlit Keyboard, Windows 11 Pro, Fingerprint Unlock, BT 4.2, WiFi 5. It’s currently selling for $339, but with a $50 coupon available, you can pick this baby up for just $289. 

This computer now serves as my backup should my AceMagic lose its magic and go belly-up. Fingers crossed.

Finally, after being punished and forced to live on crumbs for years and to live within my meager means with such a ridiculously low-ball salary, I decided I would like to have a computer, not for work but for fun. You know, watching movies, videos, goofing around with graphics, trying new distros of Linux, etc. So, I purchased another ‘El Cheapo… upon which I will now elaborate.

Auusda 15.6″ Laptop Computer, 16GB RAM, 1TB NVMe, 4C4T N95 1.7-3.4GHz, FHD Display, Backlit Keyboard, Fingerprint Reader, Big 8000mAh Battery, Win11 Pro, Upgradable to 10TB Storage, Silver, T152A, and you can still buy this laptop for the very reasonable price of $269.

Though cheap, two of my laptops have backlit keyboards and fingerprint readers, which makes Darcy jealous, since her $2500 machine has a backlit keyboard and fingerprint reader,  of which she likes to brag — and who knows what else she has going on there.

So, if you’re poor like me and in the market for a new computer, let this serve as your poor person’s computer buying guide. You don’t need to go into debt or spend thousands of dollars to find a good serviceable computer, which may well turn out to be a darn nice machine. 

So if you’re broke, let this little rant suffice to encourage you to shop around and not focus on name brands. If you’re buying a name brand for $1500, their after-sales service better be superior or you’re spending too much.

Add up the cost of all my computers, my dear friends, and you’ll find that I am about as cheap as they come. All three of my working computers together cost me less than $850. That’s less than some name-brand computers.

And that’s fine by me, you see, because…

I’m the king of cheap computers!